The Text Hoverer

TEXT HOVERER DBAG DATING

This brilliant theory is brought to you by a young comedian I met this week named Jared Freid (@jtrain56).

The Text Hoverer – the guy who is always on your radar via the multiple connecting touch points of your smartphone device (iMessage, WhatsApp, Snapchat for those of you who think they’re tweens), but never goes as far as instigating physical interaction. According to Jared, the goal of the Text Hoverer is to gain trust through consistency of communication, which enables him to bypass the traditional time and cost-consuming dating methods and shoot straight for the late night booty calls.

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Best Date Looks from Paris Fashion Week

PARIS FASHION WEEK DATE LOOKS DBAG DATING

The Paris runways can be a trippy journey, filled with sartorial mysteries that await to be metamorphosed into wearable basics, by the likes of Zara, a few month later. But have no fear, Dbag Dating is here! To mark the end of Paris Fashion Week, we decipher a selection of date looks, hand-picked for your romantic escapades come Spring!

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Does Falling in Love Make You Lazy?

DD DOES LOVE MAKE YOU LAZY

This summer, I almost fell in love. This is a courageous confession and I will say no more. (Love, like sex, is mine and mine alone b*tchez!) Somewhere around month two of our cross-Channel-tryst, I started feeling it, that very familiar, endorphin-laden high that I had practically laid a crest on, gradually transforming me into a big, dumb glob of mush. For months, I wasn’t particularly good at doing anything except chatting on WhatsApp, jumping on trains for romantic getaways, daydreaming while roaming the streets, daydreaming over bucketloads of rosé and just being a giant, walking waste of space.

Yeah, summer 2015 was fun.

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Why Are French Guys Dressing Like They’re From Brooklyn?

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In my first days of living in Paris, I quickly discovered a way to soften the notoriously frosty Parisian demeanor. “Je suis New Yorkaise,” I would utter, with what I hoped was an air of nonchalance, and would watch my opponent’s expression morph from superiority to something that could almost be mistaken for . . . admiration? Just as Paris seems to be the only city capable of intimidating the jaded New Yorker, that same fascination has been flowing back across the Atlantic in equal measure. The French are increasingly enthralled with all things New York—particularly its crunchier artisanal cousin, Brooklyn. From the endless cohort of sneakers and Levi’s 501s to the ironic Girls references to the bagel shops and vegan eateries sprouting in lieu of traditional brasseries, Paris, it seems, is getting more and more like New York’s own Left Bank. And as the new Brooklyn Rive Gauche exposition at Le Bon Marché debuts, another question arises: Just as American women have fetishized the mythical romantic Gallic gentleman, do Parisians hold a torch for the Brooklyn equivalent? And is that why every guy here wears plaid shirts and week-old stubble?

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Shopping for Vintage Fashion Like a French Girl

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Back before globalization (and the Internet) made it possible for the Saint Laurent bag du jour and the latest Chanel quelque-chose to become available worldwide, all of the best things in the French fashion world were concentrated in their place of origin: Paris. And even today, there are still some things that you just can’t find online—like the contents of many Parisian closets, which double as sartorial goldmines and are only emptied for the most in-the-know boutiques in Paris. If you don’t happen to have a French fairy godmother offering up her most prized possessions, your next best bet are some of the most trusted names on the Parisian vintage circuit—find them here.

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The Weekly Agenda of Being Single

DBAGDATING - MONDAYS SUCK - SINGLE GIRL AGENDA

“The only day I ever wanted a girlfriend was on Sunday,” a friend informed me yesterday, staring at his girlfriend of two years with a content look on his face. It was, indeed, a Sunday. The couch across from me was overspilling with canoodling couples, enjoying their blissful afternoon of using each other as human pillows. My single tush was parked on the floor, nurturing her struggles with a macadamia chocolate chip cookie.

This was not the first time I had heard the Sunday Theory, in which the holy day of R&R seems to incite the basic need for companionship in even the most stone-hearted of individuals. But where does this leave the rest of the days of the week? Let’s take a look at the internal day-to-day monologue of being single, as derived from abundant personal experience!

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