Do Men’s Looks Matter?

DO LOOKS MATTER DBAGDATING

There is an old Russian saying: “A man has to be slightly better-looking than a monkey”. This implies that a man must not be evaluated by his looks, but appreciated for his more Alpha qualities, such as brains, generosity, and hard work – attributes that will benefit a woman’s happiness in the long term. Without the crutch of conventional good looks, a man will have to work harder on earning a woman’s love and affection, hence appreciating her more once he finally wins her over. Good-looking men, particularly those who are all-too-aware of it, are considered to be a recipe for disaster, a freeway to a lifetime of speculation and paranoia about the whereabouts of a philandering Don Juan. This, for you, is Russian female pragmatism.

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What Kind of Dbag Dater Are You?

DBAG DATING QUIZ

Dbag Dating is an art, a natural talent that one cannot fake. Not only do you have to be born with an intrinsic flair for the Weird and the Wrong, but you also have to work hard on letting it flourish, avoiding squelching it with a quest for silly things such as normalcy or healthy relationships. Below is a quiz that will help you determine if you’ve got what it takes, and, if so, which Dbag Dating category you fall into!

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The Little Voice

the little voice

In a turn of events that my friends have proclaimed to be “inevitable”, I recently found myself on a date with a much older man. While we won’t yet dwell on the pros and cons of dating somebody who was wrapping up high school while I was still in the Teletubbies stage, I will definitely attribute this as being one of the more interesting dates I’ve had in awhile, as evidenced in the following tidbit of our conversation alone.

Over a tea at Café de la Poste (neither of us were drinking, myself for cleansing purposes, him for unknown elderly purposes), he gave me a brief autobiographical overview of the past 20+ years of his life. After an unsuccessful stint with marriage, he had gone through a series of long-term girlfriends, and was now happily célibataire (single), enjoying a fulfilling existence of creative friends, athletic endeavors, explorative travel, and a newfound interests in astrology. Hearing my age – 28 – he exclaimed, not without a dose of sarcasm: “Oh yes, that within the age that I actually have a real interest in women –  28 to 33. The 23-year-olds are starting to feel a bit immature.” If I wasn’t sure before, then it was crystal clear now – I was dealing with a real, certified Eternal Bachelor. No longer capable of containing myself, I made a backhanded comment about all-too-afmiliar with “his type”, leading to me pulling up the article for us to analyze together. The parallels being endless, we had a good laugh.

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10 Moments You Need to Shut Up

dbag dating when to shut up

I was recently walking around an expo at Grand Palais with two gay guyfriends, rambling on about some man-related internal debate I was having in my head, when one of them turned to me and said: “If you would just shut up and [BLEEP], you could be married to a billionaire in a month”. (The [BLEEP] part was a bit more NSFW, so use your imagination.)

His words were harsh, but they spoke the truth. You see, us women are wonderful creatures. We are beautiful and smart and communicative and caring and overall rather brilliant, with the exception one major flaw: most of us have absolutely no clue when to shut up. It appears that we all have conspicuous need to overanalyze and over-think, blurting out all the accompanying thoughts and feelings in the heat of the moment, which often triggers a natural male defence reflex to run for the hills. (Why do you think I’ve been living in France for so long? They don’t only understand 50% of what I’m saying, which technically, ups my chances at success.)

While we have all learned the Triple Thought Filtration System from La Yummy Mummy that teaches us exactly how to control our emotions, today I offer you a more thorough guideline on when you need to do it. Listen up, this is useful stuff!

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Cheater, Cheater..

dbag dating cheater cheater

Last Thursday, I was working from home, when I realized that I had lunch plans with La Yummy Mummy. With about 20 minutes left till our rendezvous, I ran a brush through my dirty hair, threw on the same black men’s cashmere sweater that I had been wearing since mid-March, and jetted out the door. Since I had ignored physical activity for about as long as showers, I grabbed a Vélib and pedaled all the way to the 1st Arrondissement. Not only was gross and sweaty and late for lunch, but I also had no idea where to park the metal monster. Spotting two guys sitting on the Bread & Roses terrace, I politely asked them if they would mind keeping their eye on the bike for a few minutes. Five minutes later, I came back out to park the bike, and one of the guys, to my surprise, started chatting me up. He was a cute, preppy-looking French boy, cleaner than the type I am normally attracted to, and even sufficiently successful in his semi-creative endeavor. (Yep, definitely not my type.) He asked me what I did, and I randomly told him all about my blog, which he looked up immediately and seemed quite entertained by. He then asked for my number, which I promptly handed over, quipping something about him wanting to be on the site.

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Should Dating be Work?

dbag dating should dating be work

When it comes to dating, there seem to be two conflicting theories. One claims that, in order to attain success in your love life, you must “put yourself out there” and approach dating somewhat as a part-time occupation, “keep your eyes on the prize” and pretty much Secret your way to marital bliss. The other, more fatalist one, pronounces that “the best things happen when you least expect them”, hence you should focus on yourself and forget that the opposite sex (or the same sex – to each their own) exists altogether.

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